Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Theme Thursday - Light


When I think about light the first thing that pops into my mind is the light at the end of the tunnel. You know how often in movies when someones knocked out or dazed or injured someone jumps in and tells that character stay away from the light! As if the light means some sort of passing to the after life.
I thought what if the light isn't the afterlife but hope of the afterlife. Then the tunnel could signify any sort of hardship, and the light is the foreseeable hope. Like is aforementioned movie character died, going towards the light would be hope of heaven.
Hope being something that's bright and shining and essential to navigate through life with.
One of those shining lights that my mum has been giving me a lot recently and although most of the time she's told me I've wanted to slap her and tell her to shut up (something I'd never do. . . well the first half). My first and only girlfriend broke up with me, well a while ago now. I seeing all the light in the situation now. My mum throughout all those month has been reminding me that I am a nice boy, and there are plenty of nice girls out there for me. The reason I wanted to slap her was because at the time immediately and a while after the break up it felt like there was no one else for me and that the world was a very unhappy place. Now however that piece of encouragement is a shining light of hope in my future. Probably not immediate, but hey I'm year 13! and next year Uni! I've got life experiences to have!
Another bright and shining hope was yesterday after my canoe polo game, I was chatting with a guy on my team we were talking about our plans for next year. When I told him I wanted to go do medicine and become a doctor. Rather than being negative like so many other people before him, he immediately asked me what specialty I'd be interested in. I could have kissed him! (Figuratively speaking of course!). That sort of encouragement made my day! The fact that someone from my school that didn't know me amazingly well thought I could become a doctor, and didn't laugh, or say something like, "So you do all the sciences then?" Or "I hear it's hard work." I guess that was more of a lamp post in my tunnel than hope. It still made my day.

I'm aware that this theme thursday post could possibly be seen as a twist on the theme, but hey whats life without a bit of spice?
Anyway what are the lights at the end of your tunnels?

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Another one of these awful things! I was bored.

► Name: Sam
► Age: 17, 11months, 5days
► Will you answer all questions truthfully: yes
► Are you single: yes
► Are you happy: Not really
► Are you bored: I'm doing this
► Are you sad: sad? Not particually, sometimes, sometimes I'm happy. I'm mainly kind of flat
► Are you Italian: no
► Are you German: no My Oma's from Germany
► Are you Asian: no
► Are you angry: Probably holding on to some anger I shouldn't be. Angry I couldn't find something that I wanted so badly to smash! GRRRrRRRRrrr
► Are you Irish: no
► Are your parents still married: Yes

TEN FACTS:
► Birth Place: Dunedin NZ
► Hair Colour: Mouse
► Eye color: blue
► Birthday: August 22nd
► Mood: Tired
► Gender: male
► Lefty or Righty: Right
► Summer or Winter: A little bit of both, I don't think I could cope with only one to be honest. I enjoy the rain, I enjoy the sun, I enjoy the snow, I enjoy the beach!
► Morning or Afternoon: Afternoon?

TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
► Are you in love: . . .
► Do you believe in love at first sight: you have to believe in love fo that.
► Who ended your last relationship: she did
► Have you ever been hurt: yes
► Have you ever broken someone’s heart: I don't think so, no ones ever told me that I have,
► Are you friends with your ex: :/
► Are you afraid of commitment: No
► Have you hugged someone within the last week: I've been hugged, Last hug was probably over a week ago.
► Have you ever had a secret admirer: wouldn't the fact that knowing about them make them a known admirer and not a secret anymore?
► Have you ever broken your own heart?: This question confuses me. Is this like wanting a soft toy really bad and going to the shop to buy it and its gone and your completely crushed? Cause when I was little there was a Pikachu I wanted really bad. . .

TEN THIS OR THAT


► Love or Lust: Love
► Lemonade or Iced tea: Iced tea
► Cats or Dogs: Depends on the mood, Both?
► A few best friends or many regular friends: Few
► Television or Internet: Internet
► Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi
► Wild night out or romantic night in: Romantic Night
► Pink or Purple: Hard one.
► Day or Night: Day
► IM or Phone: phone

TEN HAVE YOU EVER

► Been caught sneaking out: Nope.
► Fallen off the stairs: Yep
► White water rafted: Not in proper white water! :P
► Finished an entire jawbreaker: No, the end up getting thrown out or the dog gets to them.
► Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt?: hurt?
► Prank called a store: No
► Skipped School: Yes
► Wanted to disappear: Like go "Poof" and no more? I have been wanting one of those cracks from Doctor Who to open up in my wall so I can go through it.

TEN PREFERENCES
► Smile or Eyes: Both
► Light or Dark Hair: Dark
► Fat or Skinny: Normal
► Shorter or Taller: Same height or slightly shorter
► Intelligence or Attraction: Both
► Jock or Nerd: Again with the extremes!
► Hook-up or Relationship: Relationship
► Funny and poor OR Rich and serious: Money can't buy happiness.

TEN LASTS


► Last phone call you received: my Mum
► Last person you hung out with: Jacob
► Last person you hugged: Matt
► Last person you IM'ed: No idea, oh a friend whos been taken over by a bot!
► Last thing you ate: Cookie
► Last thing you drank: Milk
► Last site you went to: Dailybooth
► Last place you were: Bedroom

RELATIONSHIPS

► Are you in a committed relationship: No
► Do you want to be: Not right now
► Have you ever loved a guy/girl more than anything else in the world? Yes, I won't make that mistake again.
► Do you still love them: Yes, but not in the same way.
► Do you like someone right now: Not particually. Made a fool of myself when I thought I might've, when really I knew I didn't.

FAMILY


► Do you and your family get along: Mostly, we're a family afterall
► Would you say you have a "messed up life": I seem to enjoy making it seem messy when it's not really. Don't want to miss out on drama's!
► Have you ever run away from home: Theres been times in the past when I went and stayed the nights at a persons house. Mainly to be with them, and partly to get away from home.
► Have you ever got kicked out: nope

FRIENDS
► Do you secretly hate one of your friends: Theres friends, and theres friends. The difference is very few are friends, and others are people you know that you'd call a friend if asked but really your not that close. But no I don't hate any of them, might hate somethings they've said or done.
► Do you consider all of your friends good friends: Nope.
► Would you die for them: I don't think so.
► Who knows everything about you: No one

5 places you would like to live in
►1) Christchurch
►2) Brisbane
►3) London
►4) Paris
►5) An Island

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Nooma

Today after taking two family friends, aged 8 and almost 10 to see Toy Story 3D, brilliant movie btw, made me tear up a little bit. It's really sad and cute at the end. Definately recommend if you havn't seen it. Anyway when I was taking Cameron and Conner to McDonalds after the movie, I saw Nick. Nick is one of those people who is very much in my life, same form class at school, same youth group, same church, same Canoe Polo team (some weeks) we get on well and he's a great mate. Anyway I'd been sort of kind of itching to go to Raiders/Invaders which is a sort of bible study that my youth group does and seeing him at the mall. He invited me which was a bit of the kick I needed to go. I went and it was all about holding on to the past. And the quote below really seemed to hit me hard. The bit in bold especially.

"There's a certain kind of dispair that sets in when we believe that things were better back then.
When we're stuck back there.
When we're not fully present,
When we're holding on to how things were, our arms aren't free to embrace today."

I guess that it's become the quote of my weekend. Its kind of in line with what I've been trying to think, and process through my heart and mind.
The great thing about Nooma what Raiders/Invaders does is that its full of bible verses that relate to what its saying which means it's all biblically based as well so it's all real advice thats been God inspired.

Anyhow do you agree with the quote? Why or Why not? Do you agree with me that it's a good quote?

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Theme Thursday - Park

Parks are great places. So many memories are in parks.

I remember the first time I rode my bike with no training wheels was in a park. It was many many years ago. We had gone to visit my Oma and Grandad and because they lived in another town we had to take my bike. My Dad had promised me that he's show me how to ride my bike without the training wheels.
When we got to my grandparents house I insisted on going to the park before we had lunch. So we had to go. My Grandad came to watch. We found a soccer field and my dad got out his tools and unscrewed the training wheels and I was off. I remember how easy it was, I didn't crash at all!

Other memories at the park include picnic's with my friends, one picnic I had with one person in Autumn because we missed spring and summer. It was a great picnic.
Adventures like the up hill adventure I had with some people a few weeks ago.
More first time adventures in the park in akaroa. Like getting lost in the so called garden of Tane, which turns out to be a natural maze.

Parks are beautiful places, allowing children to learn to ride there bikes, play in the playground. Slightly older children and adults play sport. Life needs parks. I know my life does and my world does. Parks are happy places, green grass, blue sky, smiling flowers, and mighty trees.

Everythings looking up!




Yesterday, Jacob, Matt and I set out on an epic adventure. We went to the Maltworks. We explored those asbestos positive things! It was heaps of fun. I took over 350photo's! I was really happy, afterwards and didn't even get phased that much when someone let down the air in the tires of my car, which meant I had to take tires off! ARGH!

Anyway it was a great adventure, and I finally got to the top! which I discovered really isn't that hard or scary. I don't know why I freaked out so much when we went as a group. Or when I went by myself last week. O.o

It was nice to be on a high, nice to forget about everything else and just explore. Pretend to be zombie killers searching for something and fighting against the king Zombie!

Monday, July 19, 2010

One of those tick the box things

I saw this and felt like doing one, couldn't really think of anywhere else I could post it.

[] I am shorter than 5’4.
[] I think I’m ugly sometimes.
[] I have many scars.
[] I tan easily
[] I wish my hair was a different color.
[] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[] I have a tattoo.
[] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[] I wear glasses
[] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
[] I have more than 2 piercings.
[] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[x] I have freckles.

FAMILY
[x] I’ve sworn at my parents.
[] I’ve run away from home.
[] I’ve been kicked out of the house.
[X] My biological parents are together.
[] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[] I want to adopt someday.
[] I’ve lost a child.

SCHOOL/WORK
[x] I’m in school
[x] I have a job.
[] I’ve fallen asleep at work/school.
[] I almost always do my homework.
[x] I’ve missed a week or more of school.
[] I’ve stolen something from my job
[] I’ve been fired.

EMBARRASSMENT
[x] I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry.
[] I’ve snorted while laughing.
[] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something
[] I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[x] I’ve had my trousers rip in public.

HEALTH
[] I was born with a disease/impairment.
[] I’ve gotten stitches.
[] I’ve broken a bone.
[] I’ve had my tonsils removed.
[] I’ve sat in a doctors office with a friend.
[] I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
[] I had a serious surgery.
[x] I’ve had chicken pox.
[] I have/had asthma.

TRAVELING
[x] I’ve driven over 200 miles in one day.
[x] I’ve been on a plane.
[] I’ve been to Canada.
[] I’ve been to Mexico.
[] I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
[] I’ve been to Japan.
[] I’ve Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[] I’ve been to Europe.
[] I’ve been to Africa.


EXPERIENCES
[] I’ve gotten lost in my city.
[x] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[x] I’ve wished on a shooting star.
[] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[x] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
[x] I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[] I’ve been to a casino.
[] I've been skydiving.
[x] I've gone skinny dipping.
[] I’ve played spin the bottle.
[] I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[x] I’ve crashed a car.
[x] I’ve been Skiing
[] I’ve been in a play.
[x] I’ve met someone in person from the internet.
[x] I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[] I’ve seen the Northern Lights.
[x] I’ve sat on a roof top at night.
[] I’ve played chicken.
[x] I’ve played a prank on someone.
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.
[] I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I’ve eaten Sushi.
[x] I’ve been snowboarding.

RELATIONSHIPS
[] I’ve gone on a blind date.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[] I have a fear of abandonment.
[] I’ve gotten divorced
[] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[x] I’ve told someone I loved them and didn’t get a clear response
[x] I’ve felt rejected even if I wasn’t.
[] I’ve loved someone I knew a friend was already in love with.


HONESTY
[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve snuck out of my house.
[] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve cheated on a test.
[] I’ve been suspended from school.


BAD TIMES
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol.
[] I regularly drink.
[] I can’t swallow pills.
[] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.
[] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[x] I sometimes shut others out when I’m depressed.
[] I take anti-depressants.
[] I have been diagnosed with anorexia or bullimia.
[] I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it.
[] I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
[] I’ve woken up crying.

DEATH
[] I’m afraid of dying.
[x]I hate funerals.
[]I’ve seen someone dying.

MATERIALISM
[] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[x] I own an iPod or MP3 player.\
[] I have an unhealthy obsession with anime/manga.
[] I own something from Hot Topic.
[] I own something from Pac Sun.
[] I collect comic books.
[] I own something from Abercrombie.

RANDOM
[] I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[] I open up to others easily.
[] I watch the news.
[x] I don’t kill bugs.
[x] I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for the sake of being able to rhyme.
[] I curse regularly.
[] I sing in the shower.
[] I am a morning person.
[] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[] I obsess over grammar.
[] I am a sports fanatic.
[] I twirl my hair
[] I have “x”s in my screen name
[x] I love being neat
[] I love Spam.
[] I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day
[] I can cook.
[] My favourite color is either white, yellow, pink, red, black or blue.
[] I would wear pajamas to school.
[] I like Martha Stewart.
[] I know how to shoot a gun.
[x] I am in love.
[] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[] I laugh at my own jokes.
[x] I eat fast food weekly.
[] I believe in ghosts.
[x] I am online a lot, even as an away message.
[] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[x] I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[] I can’t sleep if there is a roach in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[] I love white chocolate
[x] I bite my nails.
[x] I play video games.
[] I’m good at remembering faces.
[] I’m good at remembering names.
[] I’m good at remembering dates.
[] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life

Saturday, July 17, 2010

My Plans


Last day of my holidays, before going to school for my second to last term ever. Scary when I think of it like that. Over these holidays and the weeks before it I have made some major decisions. I'm pretty happy about them. I know roughly have a 10yr plan. Not sure how that will fan out seeing as I can't keep with 1 month plans, or even plans I make for the morning!

The plan as it stands is, Finish school. Work hard in chemistry, work harder in economic's star course to bring my pass marks up to >80% (currently they're probably in late 60's early 70's).
Year 1 Go to university. Most likely Otago.
Year 1-6 Work hard. Become a doctor.
Year 7 Do my elective overseas somewhere that would need a doctor, somewhere I probably would never get the chance to work or go.
Year 7-8 Locum for a while. (Provided I don't get tied down anywhere) Pay of student loans, etc and save money.
Year 9-10 Travel the world see everything that there is to see with the money I have saved, hopefully may have found somewhere I want to live by the end of it.

As of right now that is how my 10 year plan stands. I think the possible beauty of this plan is that although it has some fixed routes, it is open for so much deviation. So many forseeable and unforseeable things could come along, leave, dance about, mess things around, and the bare bones of this plan would remain unchanged.
I can see the genius of finishing university before I explore the world, having money would mean I could explore more places, for longer, have a much wider experience and be a lot more able to cope with a disaster. Than say I went next year. Of course I am somewhat lucky having made a decision about what I want to do.

The other part I like about my plans, is that they are mine. I have come up with them for the most part. I have talked about them with my parents, my Oma some people from church various family friends. They all agree that I can achieve them which is a lot more encouraging than the laughs of the girl from school, which when I heard them cut deep. I thought friends are supposed to support each others dreams, not laugh at them. Perhaps she was just teasing, or thought I wasn't being serious. Who knows, does it really matter anymore? No.

I am an Individual, I can forge my own path in this world. I can do it with some people or without them. The only person that truely matters in my lifes plans anymore is me.
Love is a mutt from hell that I can't live without but I'm sure I can cope without if need be.

This plan is mine, for my life. I'm certain it is the first plan that I have had in atleast 4 and a half years, that is just for me. Every other one has involved someone else, been for them to succeed. Now I can make my own plans. I don't have to concern myself with her dreams, I can begin to have my own again. Now they can be mine, rather than my dreams being for her dreams to succeed. So thank you to her, and I hope all her dreams become true.

PS The picture is just of some of the things I found in my car today when I was cleaning it, thought I'd blog about them but the blog panned out differently. :)

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Theme Thursday - Help

Seeing the image of this weeks Theme Thursday I decided I had to listen to help at least once before I put to words what I've been thinking about since the theme came out so.
Here goes.

"Help, I need somebody." . . . etc.

Interestingly and conveniently I'm on a first aid course at the moment, which is all about helping someone when your the first on the scene. I'm taking it because I was considering, I'm now almost certain that I want to become a doctor. I've just got to get over that dizziness I get when people talk about broken bones, and bodily fluids around me. . . It's do able! There was a girl in my mum's class at med school that fainted everyday, when she saw blood, now she's a GP! So obviously it can be conquered!
My mum and all her doctor friends are keen to help, they like to tell me all there grossest doctor stories, to prepare me? I think, or to terrify me away from it. I'm not sure! Some of there stories are really gross. . .

I'm going to incredibly cliche and point out that one doctors are one of the most obvious people when it comes to this theme help. They help when your in pain. Like few weeks ago one fixed my little finger when I dislocated it. Very painful, however I'm glad to say it was the most painful thing I've experienced. The main reason I'm thinking I want to be a doctor is to help people. I reckon that if I can help people, make them feel better, then there will be some obvious satisfaction. I think having a job like that where everyday you're achieving something and making a difference to lots of people. There are other reasons as well. I mean committing to 4yrs university, then 2yrs as a house surgeon, 6 years of hard work you need to be certain and have a lot of good reason. I've been thinking about it for months, helping people and make a difference, while hopefully being interesting is the main reason.

Admittedly another reason is when this girl at school laughed at me when I told her. Gotta prove her wrong! That is of course near the bottom of my list though.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Meat Processing Plant

Last night I had a very odd dream.

Thomas and I had just got jobs at this meat processing plant. Not something anyone that knew us would expect us to do, Thomas wants to study to be an accountant and I want to be a doctor. Anyhow on our first day at this factory, we saw some of the fellow workers attacking someone, we both rushed over to help this person who turned out to be a young Asian women, who due to he uniform also worked at the plant. They had her on the ground and stomping on her, and talking about raping her. The two of us tried to stop them. We grabbed big metal poles and managed to bet them off of this women. We told them "What they were doing was despicable and that we would talk to someone about this as they obviously weren't fit for society."
To which the replied "We'll get you. Get you bad."
We helped the young women up and got to a first aid kit and started cleaning her up. When there was more commotion outside, sounded like the same guys were at it again.
I got there first told Thomas to look after the girl. This time it was the same guys, and some of there friends at it with another girl. They men looked towards this one man who stood a head above the rest, skinnily built. Holding a large hunting knife. He had a large scar around his throat. The men looked at me and said that's him boss. He smiled widely, creepily.
"Welcome to my factory!", he roared.
The men, his men all chuckled and laughed like he had just said the most hysterical thing they had ever heard. They were obviously cracked in the head.
As calmly as I could I asked him what he was doing to that women. He smiled at me chuckled, and informed me that "This women does not exists."
I told him "she obviously does." He said it's time for you to leave. I told him I couldn't do that not until his men stopped attacking the women and I managed to get her to a hospital.
That was the last thing I remembered, I awoke on the floor with a thumbing headache someone had snuck up behind me and smashed me in the head with a pipe. I was in the mincing room they had dragged me there. Thomas was tied up next to me and the two Asian girls were there. Looking very much worse for where, not really in any state to move, or to struggle, looking very much violated. The men were all cheery and laughing, seeing that I was awake one of them sneered at me, "This is what we do at our factory."
Dazed and horrified I watched them pick up the two women and drop them into the mincer. They then started towards me, chuckling. The man with the scar then leaned over into my face, I could smell his unbrushed teeth and the vodka. I could see the flakes from a pastry he must have eaten recently. It smelt like mince. I needed to throw up. He grabbed me by the collar and pulled me up into his face.
"You see this is what happens in my factory, and its what will happen to you if you try to stop me, but only after everyone you love."
Ungracefully he dropped to the floor and reached into my jacket and took my wallet. Emptying it of the cash, and pulling out a picture, one that I had no idea I had. From long ago. He looked at it, the cruel grin returned to his face and he leaned in close again.
"Starting with her."
With that him and his men left, chuckling and smashing bottles. I even heard them chanting, and cheering.Then I past out.
Hours later I woke, my head was killing me, and I was bruised all over. Weakly I got up, I found a stick to use as a crutch my ankle was swollen, I think it had meet with a pipe during the beating before. Thomas was still out cold. I limped to get help, I got to a phone call and rung an ambulance for him. Across the road from the factory I saw a police truck, pushing 20 or 30 people all of them female and all of them Asian. This was too much of a coincidence. I limped over to talk to the police.
"They're all illegal immigrants," said then first cop as he saw me crossing the street. "Whoa what happened to you?"
At this point my ankle gave out, I collapsed into the gutter, blackness fulled my vision. When I woke up I was in the hospital. A nurse was in the room, checking the IV lines attached to my arm.
"Ah you're awake the doctor wants to talk to you, and so do the police." she said nodding to the hallway.
"What? why?" everything was still foggy I went to scratch my head. It was then I realised I was handcuffed.
The police officer came in, I told him everything I could remember, the last part was a bit foggy.
"Do you have any id?" so we can call you relatives or something.
It was then I remembered my wallet, and my picture.
"I need to go right now" I said rising from the bed.
"No you can't leave"
"Why can't I?"
"Look at you wrist for starters" said the cop. I remembered the handcuffs, nice to see the police have a sense of humor.
"I have to go this thing is getting allot more complicated quickly, your story seems to match with what the women we picked up today. I think we can safely take those off though" He reached down unlocked the cuffs picked up his hat and left hurriedly.
I knew I had to leave now, by now the scarred man would know I'd been with the police. The girl in the photo, wasn't safe. I watched the policeman get into the elevator. I jumped out of bed, there were crutches leaned up against the wall. I grabbed them. Quickly I left the hospital, I flagged down a cab. The driver didn't need to know I wasn't planning on paying him yet.
When we got to the plant, it had changed, there were men everywhere it was swarm. These men had guns, the man with the scar had made himself an army. Across the entrance way to the plant there was a message for me. In the photo in my wallet she'd been wearing a black t-shirt, with a cartoon character on it. That t-shirt was now hungover the sign.
"Stop!" I yelled at the cab driver. I leapt out of the taxi, I knew there was a uniform in the gate house, I'd seen it that morning. Quickly I found it and put it on.
Silently I snuck into the factory.
Suddenly there was someone infront of me. He was smoking, lent up against the wall. A gun was next to him. This was what I needed. There was an axe on the wall. I picked it up. . . Slowly i stepped forward. I raised the axe up, hesitated. Then brought the handle down on the mans head. He collapsed. There was a cupboard across the hallway. I opened it up and placed him inside. Hoping he was going to be knocked out for long enough.
I picked up his gun. and continued through the factory. I was on the main factory floor. There up in the control room I could see her, she looked scared. She looked untouched, apart from a bruise on her cheek. She was strung up on a set of bars. Placed there to be obvious to everyone. There he was as well, chewing on a piece of jerky, with a pistol in his hand. Next to him on the table there was a bottle of Vodka. He wasn't alone there were another couple of men, some I recognised. One had a bandage over his head. He must have been one of the men from my earlier meetings. I made mental note to avoid him.
Suddenly there was a crash, the men in the control room looked at the scared man. He shrugged. It was obvious they all knew what to do, they ran off. The scarred man lit a cigarette and took a swing from his bottle. Said something to the girl from the photograph, and gave one of his laughs. He was clearly insane.
I could hear dogs, the police? If they were here was she safe?
Quickly I headed to the control room. I had to pause for what seemed like forever as the man with the bandage talked to some more men. He must have been some sort of lieutenant.
I managed to get up to the control room. Just as I was at the door I heard gunfire. The scarred man jumped. He pointed his pistol at her. Smiled his evil grin.
"Don't worry," he giggled, "You wont be a pie sweet heart." He fell to his knees in hysterics.
I opened the door quietly while he was having his laughing fit. It shut with a click. He froze. The girl from the photograph was tied up with her back to me. All I could see was her brown hair cover her shoulders which were shifting a terrified sob. I ducked behind a desk. I heard a sob.
"Shut up!" growled the man. I heard a smack and a loud cry.
I heard the floorboard creak. He was coming towards me. I got under the desk and held my breath. He was right next to me now. I could see his boots, they were black and covered in dried blood, and matted hair. He stepped towards the door, looked out of it down the hallway to the left, and then to the right. He took one last swig and emptied the bottle. Dropped the bottle, the glass shattered everywhere. He stumbled down the walkway back to the front of the control room. I got up, this was my chance. I hit him with the butt of the gun. He stumbled again. Dropping his gun. It went off. There was the sudden sound of gunfire raining outside of the room, it sounded distant. It was a illusion created by the rooms soundproofing, the gun fight was happening close.
The scarred man was on the floor, he was beginning to get up. Laughing,
"It's you. I didn't expect you too be here."
"I wasn't planning on it, until I saw the t-shirt. Well not coming so quickly. You forced my hand"
He laughed. "You forced mine first! This is my factory!" He roared as he lunged at me. I backed up. I pointed the gun at him.
He rushed at me, I shot him, in the leg. He looked at me, surprised.
"I didn't think you'd have the guts."
I raised the gun and smacked him in the side of the head with the handle knocking him to the floor.
I ran to the girl from the photograph. She was safe now. I untied her and she collapsed onto me. At that very moment the policeman from the hospital burst through the door, with a large German Sheppard and half a dozen armed defenders on his heels. They leapt on the scarred man and carried him away.
Everyone will be safe now, I'd saved her. No more of that evil factory.

I miss. . .

I miss, being able to play in the sand pit at kindy.
I miss, being excited to go to school, to see people, and learn new things.
I miss, playing on the fort and pretending the ground is Lava.
I miss, listening to so many of my songs and getting excited.
I miss, watching sci-fi's and not feeling like I need to be doing something else.
I miss, getting a text and leaping across the room in excitement.
I miss, getting texts from people who aren't my parents
I miss, getting phone calls.
I miss, Akaroa my favourite memories are there.
I miss, that annoying pomeranean that would bark and always be there.
I miss, keeping my head on straight.
I miss, being able to think straight.
I miss, being hugged.
I miss, having my handheld.
I miss, singing out of tune and dancing around with you.
I miss, sitting in my PJ's and playing the sims.
I miss, sleeping with a winnie the pooh duvey on a leopard covered mattress on the floor.
I miss, knowing that you care.
I miss, playing video games and feeling like I accomplished something.
I miss, not feeling so empty.
I miss, knowing that there was always someone who I could trust with anything and always be safe with.
I miss, my smile.
I miss, your smile.
I miss, being the reason for your smile.
I miss, listening to music, and having all the 'girls' being girls and not you , and all the 'love' being someone elses.
I miss, being able to ignore lyrics and just listen to the song.
I miss, having an idea in my head how it was gonna work out, not a plan, but a picture of you and me together in the future.
I miss, feeling comfortable, like I was enough.
I miss, having selfcontrol.
I miss, my laugh, not this stupid fake one that appears now to try and cover how I'm really feeling.
I miss, a goodnights sleep.
I miss, the thrill of your touch.
I miss, looking at a couple holding hands and not feeling insanely jealous at there happiness.
I miss, being the one you talked to.
I miss, having a reason to get up in the morning that wasn't because you have school.
I miss, not having to keep busy to avoid everything.
I miss, looking at things in shops and not feeling guilty for wanting to buy it for you.
I miss, looking in shops with you.
I miss, going to the food court and find parts of my meal gone cause you've helped yourself.
I miss, having you to talk to.
I miss, having a blog of substance.
I miss, my bestfriend lifes so lonely now you've left.
I miss, so many things.

What do you miss?

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Back from My Holiday!



I am back from my weekend away. I spent the time boarding with my family, and my mate Thomas. It was much better than going with myself. Thomas and I had a lot of fun doing runs that were far beyond our ability, and stacking a lot!

It was nice to be in Wanaka such a beautiful place in New Zealand, and be surrounded by the mountain air and beautiful scenery.

I was able to sigh and take a deep breath in and just enjoy the view. It was brilliant.
Unfortunately for me on the second to last night of us staying the 20 something year old's next door decided to have a party. There was a keg, and they were still going when I finally got to sleep well after 2am. Then getting up at 7am to go snowboarding did not lead to the most energetic day on the slopes. I'm still knackered now. Completely exhausted, I think I'm gonna have a super Early night tonight, straight after Doctor Who. :P

A 6hr drive, of quietness letting me think about what I want to do, has almost made me sure I want to be a doctor. So hopefully by the end of this week I'll no for certain and I can put some direction into my life!

Also I learned that listening to my music for 5hrs straight, skipping out random ones leads me to a euphoric state of mind that fills me with false hope, and a sense that following my gut might make me happy. Ah the problems with pop music!

P.S.
Does flipping a coin repetitively so that you get the other outcome mean that the later one is the preferred?

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Snow Globe Emotions (100th Post!!!)

Today I was planning on writing about the concert I went to last night, and how I got player of the day at football today and those sorts of things.

However I had a thought. I thought about being upset, how the things that seem to put you over the edge or the MASSIVE things that shock you into being upset mess your head up make it crazy. I thought it's like a snowglobe. When the ential event happens your emotions get swirled. Everything is not as it seems, calmness is out the window. Acting on your emotions at this point is dangerous, will likely not bring any good at all.
After the intial shock and swirling you begin to calm down, but everything is still in a fluster and floating around. If you say something now when your upset your likely to say something stupid that will upset someone else or send you back to the first snowglobe.
After sometime has been taken and everything has been reflected on and everything has calm down from its intial intence state of craziness. Your emotions become clear and you can act normally. If you speak now your likely to be the most rational, if your irrational then the whole snowglobe might start again!

Well that was just my thoughts for today on crazy emotions and how I seem to be effected when something majorly upsets me.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Them Thursday - Blue

Ever since I was 5 I have been a blue boy. No I don't have a medical condition and no I haven't been constantly down. I have been wearing mainly blue clothes.
All growing up my mum would always buy me the blue one, and my little brother the red one. I still wear mainly blue to this day. It was my absolute favourite colour, until about 2 years ago when it became green. However I still live in a blue bedroom. I have blue Snowboard gear, beanies, shirts, jeans, sports gear, goggles, school folders. Almost everything is blue! In fact I am currently wearing blue jeans, a blue hoodie, and a blue hat!
My parents even let me choose the colours for my brother and I's shared bathroom which is mainly. . . You guessed it. Blue.
I really enjoy the colour blue, I love clear days where the sky is wide and blue and goes on for ever. I love the ocean when its calm when there is nothing but blue waves until the horizon where it meets blue sky's.
Blue truly is a beautiful colour, and there so much of it everywhere. I still think we all need more blue. Blue sky's, blue oceans, blue seems to have a calming effect. We all need that cool blue calm.