Fed up of it all, YOU ALL.

Disclaimer: This post may contain languages that may offend some people. My advice is either 1) Don't bother reading it, or 2) Get over yourselves.

I'm so sick of everything, school, home, work, EVERYTHING!
I've realised something, well not realised its something I've always suspected. People are selfish. Atleast teenagers are. We think we're invincible, incredibly hypocritical, we think the world revolves around us and we think that everything is directed at us. I think the sooner everyone learns to get over themselves everything will be a lot happier. That or bloody hell I'm getting out of here as soon as I can.

Today I sent away applications for hotels next year in Dunedin, its terrifying to think I'll be away from my family, I know I'll miss my mum and her odd lectures and strange advice, or my dad with his random exciting story or events that he has to tell you 5 times! I'm pretty sure I'll even miss my brother with the I don't give a crap about school I'm a rock star attitude. I know it'll be an adventure, I don't mean it in the dads trying to make something sound better than it i kinda way. I mean it in a Famous Five kind of way.

I can't wait to escape school all these stupid selfish self obsessed people I have to live with most days. Its exhausting. Only a few more weeks, of that place. I will miss the place, I've been there over 13years now. Some of the people I'll miss, not being able to see some people as often. Others I'll be glad for the break. I think your like my Oma. She's a wonderful kind old lady, just EXTREMELY ANNOYING if you spend to much time with her, you'll get her life story. Days of smiling and nodding have tortured me in the past, she follows you if you start listening.
Don't get me wrong I Love my Oma, she's an awesome person. In controlled doses. I think this seems to be happening at school at the moment. Its kinda like cabin fevers going on. Those people you can only enjoy for so long are continually being thrown at you and every ones cracking.

7.1

At 0435 on Saturday morning everyone in my house, and almost everyone of our neighbours for perhaps 60-80km's were all rudely awaken by our planet. The cause of our startlement was of course the Canterbury Quake which measured 7.1 on the Richter scale.
Half awake I woke up and heard my mum yell "It's an earthquake get in a doorframe". Still half awake I peaked out from under my covers to see everything on my shelves leaping towards me and hearing things falling of desks and cabinets in every direction. This is crazy I said to myself as I pulled my duvet over my head, to which the earths reaction was "NO, your getting up now!" and the intensity of the shaking increased. Leaping out of bed I stumbled out of my bed to my doorway where I stayed until the shakes were dying down and my mum yelled get outside!
With adrenaline pumping through my body I bounded down the stairs with them still shaking to where my dad was and he quickly thrust a jacket into my hands and told me to get outside. We ran just in time before the next quake hit. Standing there with my parents and my brother we heard the earth grinding somewhere of in the distance and heard the rattling of our house.
Terrified to go back in we stayed outside, luckily for us we're one of those families with more cars than garage room for so we huddled into the back of my dads truck and listened to the radio to find out what was going on. Here we stayed for an hour an a half before we were sure there weren't going to be any more big shakes. It's sunday night now and there have been lots of smaller aftershocks. It's gotten to the point were we trust our new houses structural integrity so much that we just pause for the duration of the quake and think to our selves ok in a few seconds I might dive for the door frame or under that table, but before those seconds are up it's all over and we continue with what we're doing.
We were quite lucky my house is only about 5yrs old and building restrictions in NZ mean that it has to be built to survive atleast a 8.5 earthquake. The worst thing for us was the power cut which meant no running water and facebook!
Thankfully theres were no deaths in the city where older buildings have collapsed. A few historic buildings have been written off which is sad. School is cancelled for two days which is both cool and annoying as I was wanting to use my teachers for revision for exams in a few days! Argh!!!
It was quite fun though sitting in the sun on Saturday with my family eating food from a freezer and discussing what we should do if our power doesn't come back. It's been an exciting week, even if it provided me with enough excitement to nuglect my study for prelim exams!

No more exams!

I feel so exhusted. I suppose bing up at 11pm doesnt help me much though. I feel so tired after exam's.
Lol now continueing writing this entry at 12pm :P

Well life, is as it is! Exam's are over, school is over! Im trying to be busy. but old habits are kicking in, making sorta plans then my brain kinda panic's and i try and weasel my way out of them. Maybe i am a weasel? I dont want to be a weasel, they're ugly. And evil like the ones in Redwall! Great books btw just dont match with each other which annoys me!

Well im gonna go night nights now. . . I miss how things used to be. I kinda miss school, sad huh? It was so easy though, get up do this be here at this time and do that. Sure it was boring but it was easy. . . and i saw everyone. Oh well il have to make an effort. Im going to try and get fit these holidays! :) It should be fun, and exhusting. . . Il have to be more selfdisiplined than i was this morning though. I woke up thought i should go for a run. Thought "Stuff it rolled over and went back to sleep. Woke up again then went and had a shower and computered/weights/push ups for and hour before having milo cereal for breakfast.

I then kinda studied. Then i got Mcdonalds on the way to school for my exam said Hi to Nick, Bob and Jacob. Then did the exam. Got annoyed and spent like an hour trying to make it balance. Stupid thing! Turned out it didnt need to balance. . . which makes it incredibly GAY!!! Then did the whole youth group thing. . . It was boring except i volunteered to ask the questions to the leaders. Man it's wierd calling my Dad "Chris". He's never been Chris to me, its just so different...

Anyways im going to go and sleep now!

What the hell is going on?!

Im so confused. Why is everything so confusing? I feel something on day, the next day its just worse. I can't stop feeling the way i do. Im not a switch.

Lol I just got that song in my head

"I'll be the switch she turns on, She'll be mine too, I'll get off, I'll be the fuse that she blows, And

even with the lights out we'll glow"

Anyway, it sucks this feeling, i dont know what to do. I know what i want. The problem is its all dependent. I can't really do anything to change the outcome. This grizzling and moaning wont help me though. So il stop.

"Smile for a while and lets be Jolly, Life shouldnt be so meloncholy"

SO!!!

How was you day? I had Bob and Jacob come over and stay the only problem with the plan that we'd study was the study part. We stayed up late and watched Amazing Grace and Donny Darko. Well i didnt watch Donny Darko, i dont really enjoy that movie its got to many little storylines in it, but the over all story is far to WTF!?! Amazing Grace was a cool movie though. I enjoyed it. William Wilberforce felt all these horrible emotions and it was interesting, and understandable.

You know what i like about my blog? I can use as many "and"s in my sentence and know one can stop me! Muhuhahaha and and and and and and and anyway!

It was a good movie, we had a lack of fizzy and chips though. . . So we wont be getting fat. xD We sleept in til like 10.30 which was bad for Bob who's been await being quiet for 3hours by the time i awoke! :P I woke up and he was busy stuying! Lol he probly did more study than any of us in that 3hrs even though he confessed he probly only spent half that time studying (translation 30mins :P )

After breaky and stuff we went to study! And me being such a good boy was on Myyearbook and Bob asked me what i was studying so i truthfully awnsered Linda, a random i was looking at the profile of because id agreed with a comment she'd made on a mag so i had to Hi-5 her! Well that was probly the highlight of my day. . . Man im boring! Well i guessing studying doesnt do much good to the exciting-ness!

"They say that absence makes the heart grow founder, but i doubt it, I really doubt it."

Last exam tomorrow! So then i'l be free!!! So that will be sweet as! :) Il be able to do what ever i

like! And these holidays im gonna try and be a real social bunny i do believe! So if your reading this and I know who you are! Lets do something! lets make these holidays EPIC!

Exams

Argh!!! I just did my Maths exams and i was overconfident. I thought id be doing great in them and i was until the last question on each paper! i was like ARGH!!! SO FRUSTRATING!!! I think i may have gotten E's on two off them. But i wanted to ace them to make sure i passed NCEA with Excellence. Now the only way i will pass the year with Excellence is if i aced Economic's, ace Accounting and get atleast on E in History tomorrow!!!

SO BIG!!! AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Basically if i miss one of the Excellences im aiming for i will only pass the year with Merit! AND TO ME THATS NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!! I wish i worked harder this year on the internals i had even though i only had like 9 i got E in 4 of them and Merit in 4 and achieved in one. I wish i put just a little bit more effort in those 4 i didnt get with E, even though the some of them were english which im not very good at! ARGH!!!

Im also annoyed that so many of the subjects we've done have been unit standards! They should be achievement standards!!! (Unit standards you can only pass or fail). Its annoying cause Science which im usually getting E's and M's in this year was only unit standards apart from one test (i got E in that). And Religious studies! WTH!!! All unit standards, basically copy awnsers straight from the book! Because of this stupid subject we got offered less topic's in some exams! i mean what the hell! It was a complete waste of 3 periods a week! 30 Periods a term, 100ish Periods! WHAT THE HELL! Great way to waste 100hrs of our lives! Gosh!

Argh, oh well i should be studying for history right now so im going to go do that. I need to get E in one of the things so iv got to learn dates, places, and names of people! AH!!!

Oh well i hope your all going well with your exams and arent as ready to explode as me!

Good bye! Powering off. . .

"Good bye! Powering off. . ."
This is what my phone said to me as i looked at it dispairingly. I dont know completly how to feel. I feel numb. It's a strange feeling. Sometimes i feel hurt, like now as i type this. Other times i feel happy like last night. :) Most the time now though i feel numb. I dont really feel like doing anything. And the stress from exams doesnt help!!! Im gonna go study tomorrow if i can get up in time. I need some early nights. . . Yes tomorrow a WHOLE day studying! doesnt that just sound dreadful? I think my brain will explode. But i really need to study maths and to study history. . .

Argh!!!

Im mega tired. . . so i hope i don't make to many errors.

What have i been up to you wonder?
Well iv spent two and a half days studying at my mummys work! Full days like 7-8hrs of hard studying. I have also done a english exam (went terribly i think :( ) and a economic's exam which was a walk in the park on a summers day, if i do say so my self! I have more exams coming up so im a bit stressed at the moment. I went to the Gym yesterday with Siobhan, and she was right it is fun! But i was smelly afterwards. She was wrong though about looking completly disgusting afterwards!

Whats going on in my life?
Lot's Exams, Relationships, tiredness! Exam's ARGH!!!! Relationships, meh!!! People can be painful, and it hurts :(. Some people are sad and thats no good. Others i dont know, its just wierd hanging with them. Maybe some of thats cause i feel so numb? Im not sure. I miss some things. The way they used to be. Even though there were many things wrong. I wish it could be fixed. I hate things that have happened.

Right now?
Im wishing i didnt send those last to txts. . . Im not sure if i can deal with the truth. Its going to hurt me. Heres the reply now. . . *deep breath* FUDGE. Yes well that wasnt what i expected. . . Nor was it what id hoped for though.

Im sooo tired. I might try and go to sleep. Good night peoples. Pray for better days! Pray for happiness, Pray for an end to all this confusion. Pray for People who you Love. Pray. . .

:)

First to be said goodbye too

Well Hello, reader.
Yes singular! Lol that's all i think anyway! :p Oh well i only have 3 peoples blogs that i follow.

Any way! the point of this blog! Im not happy at the moment. Obvious reasons, but one seems to be the way things are going around everyone. I dont know if its just me, but i feel like EVERYONE is saying hello to be last, and goodbye to me first. Maybe im just being crazy. But thats what it feels like. And being the last one to be replied to as well. I remember a time when i'd literally spring across the room when i got a txt, casue i hoped it'd be from someone and often it was. I liked to think the other person did the same. I still do that sometimes. Anyhow it could just be life at them moment thats making me feel like this; it could just be growing up; it could be exams.

Im tired and stressed. And i guess typing a blog at 20mins past 11 doesnt help at all if your tired. Im stressed about my friends. Im not happy; some of them are some of them are worse than me! and i can not understand why! Sure its all stressful at the moment. Sure we've got issues! We need to talk through them with people, sort them all out. Then we can smile and be happy! We can pretend to be happy but when it all explodes in our face, we dont feel happy anymore. We wont feel happy and we'll stop feeling happy. It's what i try'd to do. Ignore it; pretend it'd never happened; pretend it'd all changed. It worked for a night, a day, a few days. But i always. ALWAYS got slapped back into reality by a big fat ugly fish.

Oh well, a desperatly tired boy says many things! I miss my life up intil 2months ago, i miss my life up until about 14months ago. That was when it was the best. Before the brown stuff hit the fan so to say.

MEH!!!

HELLOOO!!!!

Why hello there peoples!

How are you?

Im a bit annoyed,

For 1 i missed a free Elemeno P concert! Argh!!! Why wouldnt they send all there Chch fans a email bout a free concert in Victoria Square?!

My Dad txt me during History about it cause my Mum had driven past there and seen it/ heard it on the radio or something. So all i could say to that was bugger. Another thing thats annoying is CREATIVE WRITING!!! I dnt have very good skills of the English! If there is anything i may fail English is it. ARGHHHH!!!! I hate English! and our school has stripped down our english basically you fail one standard then you may not have enough credits to get into yr 12 english!!!

And to add to that my class is Cabbage! Half the class left the exam as soon as possible and most of them didnt even try all the exams. They dnt even try to learn they just go to talk. To prove it in one of the papers 6/30 people passed. 4/6 got MERIT!!! Meaning theres is quite a substantial difference in the intelligence of the class.

and People! Sometimes they'r stressful.

But thats another time!

Better Days

Little man got no plan, no strategy

Lives on the corner of circumstance and Wellesley

Caught in the middle of someone else's fairy tale

Sucks it in stumbles up, up to her he says

I like you, Do you like me?

Let's get together, have adventures, it could lead to something

I like you, Do you like me?

Let's get together, have adventures

It could lead to better days

It could lead to better days

Little man, little dreams, little destiny

His life's a plea that won't be heard by you or me

He's not the guy that gets the happy ending fairy tale

He looks up, sees the girl, goes to her he says

I like you (I like you)

Do you like me? (Do you like me?)

Let's get together have adventures it could lead to something

I like you (I like you)

Do you like me? (Do you like me?)

Let's get together, have adventures

It could lead to better days

We could lead to better days

It could lead to better days

We could lead to better days

I've been out in the desert

For much too long

Holding hands with the devil

It's a sad sad song

I'm at the end of my courage

And so far gone

So say goodbye to the darkness

So long

I like you (I like you)

And you like me (You like me)

Lets have adventures, it could lead to something

I like you (I like you)And you like me (You like me)

Lets have adventures, it could lead to something, hoping it will lead to better days

It could lead to better days

We could lead to better days

It could lead to better days

Help me out, Help me out, Help me out

Hey hey

Buhbye!!!

ARGH!!!!

IM SO ANNOYED!!!

My stupid little brother keeps trying to go on my Drums! there are many reasons i dont want him to.

1) He used a hammer on them once

2) He's only doing it to annoy me

3) I dont go in his instruments

4) He doesnt hit the drums right he damages the skins!

5) He's a git that i can't stand so why would i let him use anything of mine?!?! Espeshially as he doesnt ask!

6) I just dont like him

7) I dont like people touching my stuff if they dont know how to use them.

8) When he's gone on the before he's moved everything!

9) I hate my brother.

10) He's sone on before and broken 2 sets of MY drumsticks.

Im sick of my brother.

Im sick of my family! Why can't my parents understand i dont want him touching my stuff!!! I dont go touch there stuff or play there instruments!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

I cant deal with this extra stress iv got a bloody maths exam!!! on thursday!!! (btw im allowed to say bloody i do history)

Anyway now that this is the third time since the weekend i probly should tell you bout the awsomeness.

On Saturday i went to Ticketek (ticket-ek?) (ticket-tek?) to buy tickets to go to the Smokefree Retro gig thingy. It was WICKKED!!!

Performing were;

Anika Moa,

Elemeno P,

OpShop,

Evermore,

Anna Coddington,

Autozamm,

Minuit,

Goodnight Nurse

They played in the order of who ever was in rockquest most recently so first was Beneath the Silence cause they won the night before. I liked them but its not my cup of tea. but Man!

GOOD NIGHT NURSE AND ELEMENO P they were awsome!!!!!!!!

I knew all the words to most of there songs and it was great fun! Their wasnt many people there.

ElemenoP played my favourite song! Louder Louder! Its off there new album and they just released it as a single on Sunday? i think but i know all the words so i sung it and it made me super de duper happy! And then i stayd at Siobhans housey but then i got sick so on Sunday my Mummy had to come and pick me up. And i went home but it was a good weekend.

TTYL!!!

AH!!! EXAMS!!!

Right now i should be studying! I had to exams today. I didnt know any dates for my History exam (not the greatest idea) and i ran outta time in my accounting exam. Mainly from stupid mistakes. The brillient thing in accounting is that because its all built up on each other you can awnser a number of the questions based on the questions further through the paper or in the next exam paper. REALLY ANNOYING when you realise you made a mistake and you need to redo 6 or 7 questions cause you classified something wrong! Dont try and rush, take your time but dont relax. I relaxed during the accounting exam to much so i ended up rushing the last paper and stuffing up easy stuff! wich was super stupid!

I also forgot my lunch. But since it was exams i got to go to the super market during the 2hr break between my exams. Me and Daniel got a cooked Chicken. And bread rolls! Seonbu got dessert Chocolate and we shared that.

But man talk about market segmentation gone wild! $3.23 for 6 bread rolls or $3.42 for 20! I chose the 20 but man thats rediculous. Either the packaging is whats exspensive and that making a bag three times as big is cheaper. like 10c and breadrolls are dirt cheap or someones getting ripped off some where!

Anyways economists and English professors! i should be studying i have Eco and Eng tomorrow!!! AH!!! Can you tell im a little stressed?

Good bye world!

How can i?

How can i concentrate?
How can i get better?
How can i pass these exams!?!?!
How can i help you to see what i see?
When all you ever try and do is try and make me see how you see?
How can i fix you?
How can i make you smile?
How can i cope these changes?
How can i survive this cold!?
How do i get rid of my cough and my headache?
How do i make you happy?
Why do you feel that way?
Why wont you help me?
Im trying my hardest!
I need you to be therefore me.
I cant cope with this much longer. . .
I feel like im going to explode!
I'm sick.
I'm tired.
I'm going to study.
I hope you ring.
If you dont soon im going to sleep.

Know Il always Love you.

To the end and beyond.
And remember "What seems to man to be righteous and good may in Gods eye be evil." or something like that.

Good Bye.